An Empath Can Never Have Too Much Space Between Them and Negative or Toxic People

As an Empath, it can be challenging to manage your energy, especially when you are in settings where there is a negative or toxic person or group of people. I have found that the simply moving away from the source of negativity does wonders for me.

What is a negative or toxic person you ask? Well, they tend to be people who have issues with maintaining relationships. They judge others, dwell on the past, have anger issues, they can never be wrong and tend to be brown-nosers.

These types of people like to be the center of attention even if it is negative attention. They will do anything to get you to pay attention to them and see their point of view even if they tell you lies or fib to you.  They also tend to leverage themselves into a position where people have but no choice but to pay attention to them.

Negative or toxic people tend to either stir up drama or feed off of others, and at times will even help it to manifest. They manipulate, they like to control, and they like to withhold information that can be a benefit to others. They also like to blame others for their circumstances.

Do you know anyone who fits this bill?? A relative? A co-worker? A hair-dresser? A class-mate? A stage mother? A sports parent? A drinking buddy?

It is nearly impossible to avoid negative or toxic people all together, especially at social gatherings, in the workplace, at school or church functions, or at your child’s extracurricular activities. As an empath, physical closeness can increase the absorption of a negative person’s feelings or energy. With that said, I have found it extremely effective to distance myself physically from such people. And by distancing I mean at least twenty feet or more. In cramped quarters, that isn’t always possible but in the least, it is helpful to avoid as much contact as possible with negative or toxic people. Give yourself permission to change where you are sitting, stand on a different side of the room, or take frequent breaks from the crowd if need be. Sure, it can come off looking anti-social or snobby, but I have let go of being worried about what other people think as my own energy, or how I feel physically, outweighs other people’s opinions. And really, if it is a negative person that one is trying to avoid, that person isn’t giving you a second (positive) thought anyway. Right?

Integrity is Hard to Ignore When you are in the Midst of an Awakening

I have always thought of myself as an honest person. Sure I give little “white lies” to my children as needed, and maybe I don’t always tell my husband “everything” that I bought during a shopping trip, (or really much about ALL of my psychic abilities at this point – yet) but on the whole, I am an honest person, I try to be a person of my word, and I try to my best to help people and to not to hurt them.

integrity-2Though I have read that “increased integrity” (honesty) is a “symptom” of the Spiritual Awakening process, I am not sure if me noticing my integrity and the integrity (or lack thereof) of those around me is part of my awakening process alone, or if it has something to do with the way that the world itself is “waking up” and taking notice of wrongdoings. I am referring to the lack of integrity that we are taking notice of in places like the entertainment world, the political world, the medical field and in our educational and religious institutions. It is as though the masks are falling away and the truth and B.S. is starting to reveal itself. And for the record, I am far from a perfect person, but lately that kick-in-the-gut-when-something-isn’t-right-feeling keeps showing up for me again and again when I am around certain people, watching certain things or hearing certain information. The kick-in-the-gut-feeling tells me to leave the room, change the channel or to remove myself from the people I am associating with.

I have noticed examples of integrity, or lack thereof, popping up around me, as well as for other people I know.  I have a friend who recently witnessed the cracks in authority in her child’s school that she used to trust whole-heartedly. I have another friend who, in recent months, became heartbroken when she witnessed a lack of integrity from her childhood church which she now attends with her family. Another parent I know recently stepped down from his child’s PTO and another family I know removed their child from the sports team that he was part of – all situations had the same thing in common – a lack of integrity. Clearly I am not along, here.

In the last few months, I personally recognized the lack of integrity of a local, non-profit organization that I have belonged to for over five years. In my time with this organization I have seen a few things that have shown (a small number of) members’ true colors here and there, and I just sort of dismissed it and moved on, but recently I witnessed grown adults flat out lying and covering up facts to other adults about a negative situation that happened. Word had also gotten out that some members of the organization were difficult in working alongside another organization at a community event that was held during the holidays last year, among other negative rumblings about the organization throughout the community.  During my involvement, I have continually watched some of the organization’s so-called “leaders” stunt the growth of the organization for their own ego(s) and resistance to change – change that could happen for the better of the community that is serves.

integrity-1None of us have integrity 100% all of the time, but I find it hard to support and be a part of an organization, whether it be a school, a church, a local group,,  or even a local sports team that acts like this. And though I’ve dismissed a few things that I have seen in the organization during my time there, I haven’t seen things as ugly and toxic as I have in recent months. I don’t know if part of this has to do with my “gifts” and energy sensitivities, or if the crap is really just coming up to the surface. In the time leading up to me deciding to depart from the organization, I actually had visions (and I still get them) of me walking away from the organization and it imploding behind me. (Like literally exploding, smoke, explosions and all, as I walk away.) I’ve heard through the grapevine that meeting attendance has drastically shrunk at the organization’s monthly meetings so perhaps the vision was not far off.  I’ve had conversations with other members who have shared that they feel that it is time for them to also move on, though for some, it hasn’t been easy. What is also interesting that I am seeing is that a majority of those who are sticking around are those who are more toxic or have more toxic personalities. (“Like things” – or like energies – tend to stick together.)

I realize that it is not up to me to judge those who are still “driving the bus” of the organization.  When you know better, you do better and most of them don’t know any better.  Nor is it up to me to judge those who have decided to stick with the organization – for now. Through my transformation process I have learned that I don’t need to judge, I can just observe and take myself out of the dance. But in the meantime, I can do it with integrity.

###

 

The stories and topics that I share are as I have observed them, as I have lived them, and as they have happened to me, along my journey. They are not intended to hurt anybody and they are told as I have experienced them. I have also done my best to protect the identity of the subjects in my writings. If you find yourself reading something and suddenly question: “Is that about me?” If that is the case it probably is to some degree because there’s absolutely some kind of lesson in there for you.
If the topics or stories on my blog or in my other writings are not relatable to you, then it is not for you, at least not at this time. We are all in different places along our journeys. What resonates with some, won’t even touch on the surface for others.