Sometimes I ask Spirit for Help in Writing Birthday Cards, Condolences and Text Messages

writing card blogI don’t often post a “Happy Birthday” on social media to those I am close with. Instead I will send a card (I know, I’m old fashioned), give a phone call, send an email, or a text. And better yet, I refuse to post an “I’m sorry for your loss” on social media to people that I am close to when somebody passes away. (I am at the age when many of my friends and contacts parents are passing away.) I know that technology is changing our world but to me, social media seems too impersonal. (Some days I want to swear off social media all together, but then I stop to think, how would I find out about child births, engagements and funerals otherwise?) When loss happens to somebody I know well, or somebody I have a history with, I will send a card or a text to the person who is grieving. Many times in the card, I find that I will write a lengthy message that I know that I didn’t solely write myself.

I usually have to quiet my mind and get in a quiet space. At times when I first start thinking about what to write, I feel a bit blocked, but once I get going the words just flow out of me. Sometimes when I feel blocked, I will “ask for help” sometimes from my helpers (Guides) and sometimes in the case of death, I will ask the deceased if they can help with the message that I am to write.  Once I finish a card, (or sometimes a text if I think that will be better received), and send it on its way, I nearly forget what the message is or was (sort of like after doing a reading). It is like the message falls right out of my brain. No joke. Sort of like it never happened.

I never thought much of the messages that I write until I started to get validation about the information that I was writing. Sometimes someone would simply say something like, “Wow! I really needed to hear that at the time I read your message.” And other times, the validation goes much deeper. Like the time I sent a condolence card to a grade-school friend of mine whose husband had passed.  The passing was a delicate situation so I wanted to make sure that I choose my words carefully. I finally got the information to flow (no need to know the details) and wrote it down in a card and sent it on its way. A few months had past and I had run into a close friend of my grade-school friend in a parking lot at a store. We chit-chatted for a moment and then all of the sudden she stopped and said, “You know what? That card that you gave [my friend], she showed it to me and it was so sweet. What you wrote she needed to hear and it really helped her.” As she started to tell me this, I felt chills go down my body and the tears started to roll down my face. (Both chills and tears, though they don’t always happen together, are validation for me from Spirit.) Better yet, as I am typing this, I feel the tears welling up. 😉

For like two days after this conversation in the parking lot, I kept thinking “Wow!!” And how in “Awe” I was by the conversation… the chills…the tears… the whole thing!

On the flip side of this, I have had times when I go to write a message, or think that I should be writing a message, and I find that I don’t have anything to say. I literally don’t have words. I find that I’ll purchase a card and let it sit on my desk for a few days, which turns in to a few weeks, which sometimes turns into – it never gets sent. I used to (and sometimes) still feel guilty about this, but recently I have come to understand that perhaps I am not to me the messenger in certain situations. Perhaps the person on the other end isn’t open to receive the message that I may have, or better yet, it isn’t the right time for them to hear anything. Everyone grieves in different ways and is open and receptive to different things. I’ve tried to let go of the guilt and pressure that I feel in these situations. Either way, I am thankful and honored to be able to deliver messages to people who need them.

XOXO

– Maura

 

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The Goodbye Dream

Goodbye dreamI’ve heard this term before: The “Goodbye Dream.” (Some call it the “Farewell Dream.”)  It is the dream that you have after somebody passes away. It is a dream where you both connect and say goodbye in some way. You are given some kind of closure or are re-assured that the person is okay.

I think that I had my very first goodbye dream when I was 17 or 18 years old. At least that is the first one that I can actually recall.  It was a visit from a co-worker. I remember after waking up from the dream, feeling as if a heavy weight had been lifted.

Last night I had a dream about my uncle who recently passed. He passed less than a month ago. I hadn’t seen him in nearly five years. His daughter and her family moved him out of state to live with him. We didn’t keep in touch via phone as he was hard of hearing and deaf in one ear. I’d send photos of the kids and gifts at Christmas, and cards on his birthday, but never heard if he received them. Loved them. Or hated them.  I never took offense to it, as I know that the lack of feedback on the items sent weren’t his doing.

I had a premonition of when I thought that he’d be passing. I thought that he would pass around the Christmas holiday. I pictured it to be a holiday when people were together. He actually passed on Thanksgiving instead.  When I had the vision of him passing, I actually saw my sister being there.

In the weeks leading up to my uncle’s passing, I prayed “to” him, sort of like a conversation in my head to him. I also prayed to my aunt, his wife, who passed years previously, as well as to other relatives. Once he passed, I lifted him (along with his daughter and her family) up in prayer. When praying, I let my uncle know that I have some gifts. (I still can’t totally hear as I still get the buzzing in my ear but the buzzing is sometimes different now.)

Though we hadn’t talked or seen each other in a while, I didn’t think that anything was wrong between us. No hard feelings. No grudges. Others who were around him might have their own opinions, but I never thought of anything being left on a sour note. However, after my uncle visited me in his Goodbye Dream, I was FOR SURE that all was good between us!

The dream seemed to unfold so fast once it got started. It was a very vivid dream and one that every detail stuck with me afterwards. I recall feeling cold, though I was under the covers when I started to fall asleep. Then I remember the chill going away as I fell into the dream. The dream started with my uncle coming out of a garage. This total made sense as he loved to work on cars. Old cars. He was wearing a light colored sweater and light colored pants. Not necessarily something he normally wore, but I remember thinking while dreaming that the light colored clothing looked very angelic.

As he came out of the garage, he sat at what looked like a park bench. The bench was near where his and my aunt’s front step was that lead into their breezeway. It was like the bench was running perpendicular to the garage. It was like I was standing in the driveway of their old house, yet it was different. My uncle was built like an old football player (which he was), he had an athletic build, but he looked to be in what I think his

He sat on a bench that was running alongside where he and my aunt’s front deck step was at their old house. It was like we were in the driveway of their old house, yet it was different. And though he was 76 and ailing when he past, in my dream, he was built like an old football player (which he was), he had an athletic build, and he looked to be in what I think was his late 50s. He had a head full of white, thick hair, and his beard was really dark and thick, like the color I remember his hair and beard to be when I was a young child. He looked strong and healthy.

We sat on the bench together and hugged and snugged. It was as though I was sitting on his lap like a small child at times. He kept kissing my repeatedly on the cheek and kept calling me by the nickname that my aunt gave me. We both told each other “I love you” and then the dream was done.

Just like that. Done.

When I woke in the middle of the night, I felt like someone touched or brushed my leg. I wasn’t scared. I just said “hi!” Then, while lying in bed in the dark, I heard the sound of a paper being moved (I have scrap booking stuff in our bedroom – a project that never gets done) followed by the sound of the window blind next to my bed making a quick “tap” sound. I simply said “Hi! I can hear you!”

….. And then I fell back to sleep for the night.

This morning I awoke with excitement yet felt contentment. Trying to replay the dream over and over again in my mind so that I wouldn’t forget any details.  I felt that I had closure since we got to connect like that last night.