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Another Mysterious Health Symptom – Food Allergy or another Affinity to My Awakening Process?

I’ve had a slew of medical and mysterious health “symptoms” along my awakening process. I have learned that some of my symptoms have had to do with changes in my body, changes in my energy, or changes in the energy in the solar system or on the planet. I’ve learned that some of my symptoms and even anxiety can have to do with emotions or experiences working themselves to the surface. I have also learned that the “symptoms” can be a nudge from my body when I am venturing off my path or purpose, trying to get me to where I need to be.

I will go long time periods without having any issues and then Boom! Something happens and some medical mystery pops up which is followed by panic, a lot of Google searching, and a slew of doctor visits and tests that lead to, well, nothing that Western Medicine can figure out. In the past, I’ve had medical mysteries last weeks and even months and then disappear.

Today’s Mystery:

This morning was a morning like any other. Before taking the kids to the bus stop, I had my usual coffee and decided to have a banana. Nothing out of the ordinary. I drove to the bus stop (It’s below zero out today).

Before the bus even arrived, it started. My mouth and tongue started to tingle and my lips started to feel funny. My mind automatically goes off the deep end thinking that my throat is closing up. I looked in the mirror to see if there was any swelling. So far, there wasn’t. In the mists of the panic, I couldn’t tell if my throat was closing up or not, or if I was experiencing anxiety. (In these situation, I’ve learned to try to take a moment and evaluate the situation to see if it is really an emergency or anxiety.) I tend to carry a bottle in of water in the car with me (and even Benadryl in my wallet) at all times. I took a few sips of water to make sure that I could swallow. I could. I held off on the Benadryl for now. I hate taking it because then my day is shot by being so tired. I swear that it also wreaks havoc on my thyroid and adrenal glands and messes with my emotions, too.

I called my neighbor to see if she was home. My thought was that maybe if went to her house and chatted for a bit, I’d get my mind off of things and start feeling better. I got her voicemail immediately. I then texted her to see if she was home this morning – she didn’t text back immediately. I didn’t feel that I needed the ER so I circled back to my house. I popped a half of a Benadryl (in the event this was some sort of an allergic reaction) and then I attempted to meditate to try to settle my anxiety.

My neighbor called me back and offered to take me to the doctor or if she could help with anything. We chatted about the things we have been up to later so that helped to calm me as well. She offered to check in on me again later.

Of course the Benadryl, even though I only took half a dose, makes me a feel like I’m walking around in a fog. I tried to work on some journal entries and get some house stuff done. I noticed that my mouth still didn’t feel quite right – like I scraped my tongue on something hard or burnt it. I then noticed that my mouth, lips and even my lower half of my face felt like it was having muscle spasms. (My teeth and gums have been feeling sensitive lately, but I have blamed that on being out of my good toothpaste and using my husband’s instead.)

To make matters more anxious and stressful, my husband is out of town traveling. That adds stress to situations like this because I worry that if I do have a medical situation or end up in the ER, how will the kids be handled once they are home after school or if something happens in the middle of the night.

I had similar sensations to what I had today, once before, like 6 years ago. My tongue had a burning sensation to it for a few days. (I blamed some spicy meal we had at first, but then it lasted for a few days.) My throat felt like it was going to close up, but back then, I didn’t recognize the anxiety. Western medical doctors told me that my sensations might have to do with acid reflux and to take an over the counter 24-antacid and to follow up with an allergist. The allergist couldn’t come up with concrete findings in her allergy testing, besides the fact that I had seasonal allergies and suggested that I take a 24-hr allergy medicine and suggested that I could take up to 2 in a 24/hr period. She also suggested that I carry Benadryl and an EpiPen, but again, no concrete answers on what I was allergic to enough to cause the sensations that I was experiencing.

Further along in my morning, I asked that “if the face and mouth symptoms are not for me, to please put them back in their proper space and time.” (A little Empath trick that I learned to do when trying to determine if the symptoms that I have picked up for really mine or not.) Well, after asking, I still had the symptoms, though they subsided a bit.

As I write this, my ears are buzzing like crazy, (and the face/mouth) has subsided. I also have a tingling in my head. I get the buzzing when Spirit is trying to get my attention. The buzzing is hard for me to tune in to because I do feel so short circuited after the anxiety kicked in. However by having the symptoms changed after I asked (free will) I am calmer in the fact that perhaps this isn’t a medical situation as much as a Spirit situation. I also feel my hands and feet pulsating.

I happened to be in contact with my acupuncturist today, as well as one of my mentors. Some of the reasons that I may be experiencing these symptoms could be:

 – I reached out to a mentor of mine. She did suggest that I could be sensitive to the banana (which I haven’t noticed before, but with my every-changing sensitives, you never know). She suggested that I make sure that I wash my fruits and veggies well.

– She also reminded me that we become more sensitive as we awakening more and become more intuitive. (Something I’ve told others, but forget to remind myself.)

 – The metaphysical emotional meaning as to what I am experiencing with my mouth/lips/tongue: Not speaking truth, sexual shame, not feeling supported to speak up. Not feeling valued. (Time to look for parallels.)

 – Teeth symptoms: Pondering over new information or solutions and pondering new ideas. (Which I have been.)

 – I asked my Acupuncturist what my symptoms could mean in Chinese Medicine. She suggested that it could be “Wind.” (Wind is one of the six external factors of disease – six Qi or six Yin/Six Excesses – that can attack the body, enter the meridians, and cause external diseases.) She said that Wind can cause spasms, coughing, sneezing and itching.

 – I read that the twitching symptoms could have to do with claircognizance “downloads.” These meaning that these downloads are like software or app upgrades on computer devices, except they are happening to a person.

changes aheadFor all that happened today, my day has seemed to fly by. It looks like I have some internal reflecting to do.

I am sharing this experience to help anyone else who is experiencing mysterious ailments and symptoms to not feel alone.  You’re not alone! And you’re not crazy!! You’re just going through an awakening!!

Intuition, [Social] Media and Law Enforcement

This post is not meant to be insensitive to real acts of discrimination and homophobia, nor is it intended to downplay the dangers that our first responders face every day, but rather to discuss how those with strong intuitive or emapthic abilities struggle with what plays out in the media, as I bring up two different stories that had far different outcomes than what the media (and even social media) first suggested happened, in this particular post.

Smollett+caseToday day I woke up to the headlines that read: Police: Two brothers told investigators they were paid by Jussie Smollett to stage attack. I will tell you that from the get-go, that this case, as it was stated in the media, never felt right to me.  From the first time I heard about Jussie Smollett’s attack (Smollett, who is black and gay, said he was attacked while walking home through Chicago’s Streeterville neighborhood. He told police masked men tied a noose around his neck, poured bleach on him and yelled the slurs at him.) Something felt very off or inauthentic about this story to me. Better yet, I felt that the story or incident was fake. I of course kept these thoughts to myself as the world we are living in today IS full of discriminative and homophobic acts. These things really do happen.  Because these alleged incidents happened to an actor, they took center stage in the media.

meganWithin moments of the story breaking and in the days to come, outpouring from stars and social media were made known and publicized. Each time I heard or saw someone showing their support or making a statement on behalf of what Smollett alleged happened to him, I honestly felt a kick in my gut. I kept thinking that this doesn’t feel right. It has been fabricated. The statements made by his family felt off, too. It got to the point that I found myself trying to avoid the story – turning the channel, swiping faster through a newsfeed, or changing the radio station. It was as if I was shutting down around the story whenever it came up.

This sort of thing – thinking that a story in a community, or in the media just isn’t feeling right – I have experienced before. One of the really memorable times was when I first started to realize that I myself was an empath and that I had strong intuitive abilities.

joeThe story that I am referring to is the death of Lt. Charles Joseph “Joe” Gliniewicz of the Fox Lake, Illinois Police Department that happened back in 2015. I live in the Midwest so this story was front and center from the moment it happened. The media started to paint a picture of a heroic man who had 30 years on his force, who was an Army Veteran and who was running a non-profit Explorer organization for children in the community, who was murdered while on duty. The media put him on a pedestal and gave him the nick name of “G.I. Joe.”

RIP GI JOEI noticed that people, even those who never knew him started to change their social media profile pictures to show their support for him, re-posting different images and news stories showing support for “G.I. Joe” and wanting justice for those who were responsible his death. There were reports of numerous people donating large sums of money to find the people who supposedly killed him. I remember that it didn’t feel right to me but I didn’t think much of it. The story was hard to get away from as it was everywhere.

In the days and weeks that followed, I kept getting different tidbits that would pop into my head. Things like “this case has to do with a woman.” Things like “money had something to do with this.” And thoughts like “this guy really isn’t a hero.”

Well, low and behold, as time when on, I later discovered that my “thoughts” WERE my intuition and that my intuition was correct. You can goggle the story for more details but basically Mr. Gliniewicz was using non-profit funds for his own use and was raising a red flag with a female who was now accusing him of such and it was later determined that he committed suicide as an end result of the extensive criminal acts he had been committing.

Everyone has intuition, some of us just have stronger abilities than others. Just like some of us are more athletic than others, a better cook or a better artist or musician than others… you get the idea. And an Empath trait is to “shut down” or find themselves avoiding unauthentic people.  I guess you can say that I shut down when I hear certain news stories or see things on social media.

Both the media and social media get to me more challenging for me to be around. Both make my blood boil as both can assist in making things something they are not. Intuitive abilities aside, I personally wish that the media would stop trying to entertain us and play on our emotions and just state facts when they report on a new story. When did the media decide to make “characters” (good or bad) out of the subjects in the news?  When did other people’s social media posts and photos on social media become statements that are used on the news to help spin a story?

Though it doesn’t happen all of the time, but really it DOES happen too much, I wish that law enforcement would not release so much information so that the media didn’t have so much information to play up for entertainment purposes and that people sitting behind their phones or screens could forward/repost stories in which all of the facts aren’t figured out yet.

I also wish that the general public would not be so quick to cling on to the media’s every word or to everything that they see in their social media newsfeeds and wait for the facts to come out.

For myself, I wish that I would not question the information that my intuition gives me the first time that I receive it. I also wish that I didn’t feel the need to have my information validated in order to feel comfortable sharing it.

 

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The stories and topics that I share are as I have observed them, as I have lived them, and as they have happened to me, along my journey. They are not intended to hurt anybody and they are told as I have experienced them. I have also done my best to protect the identity of the subjects in my writings. If you find yourself reading something and suddenly question: “Is that about me?” If that is the case it probably is to some degree because there’s absolutely some kind of lesson in there for you.
If the topics or stories on my blog or in my other writings are not relatable to you, then it is not for you, at least not at this time. We are all in different places along our journeys. What resonates with some, won’t even touch on the surface for others.

When Parenting and Empath Abilities Collide

Empaths absorb the energy and symptoms of others. When we absorb ailments of others, we take them on as if they are our own. When we take on ailments, we can heal the other person.

mother daughterYesterday my youngest walked in the door from school with what looked to be a dark red patch on her face. Upon further investigation it looked like a rash or a bug bite of some sort. (Never mind we are in the middle of winter here in the Midwest.) She has extremely sensitive skin so I first went through a list of questions asking what she might have put on her face to cause this – lotions, hand sanitizers or soaps at school, etc. She said that it itched and hurt. I tried to figure out when during the day this happened. According to her, it started early in the school day.

We took the necessary steps to ease her symptoms. Within moments of giving her face attention I started to itch around my face and shoulders. I even noticed some hives starting on me. This of course alerted me to ask my daughter if she was itching or bothered in other places and she said “No.”

Itching and hives on ME tend to put me I a bit of an anxious spiral as a person who has had many an unexplained allergic reaction of my own along my awakening process. I used to carry Benadryl and epi pens with me everywhere I went. (At the begging of my awakening process I was popping Benadryl like it was candy, as I was always itching and my throat regularly felt like it was ready to close up.)

When I take on symptoms from others (sometimes I know whose symptoms I have taken on and other times it can be a complete stranger like someone out in a public place or in my neighborhood or somebody’s energy that I am tapping into) my first instinct is to protect myself (so that I don’t absorb what is not mine) and then to send it back to its rightful owner and to put it back in its proper space and time.  (I know that this “wording” may sound crazy to some, but the putting back of the ailments of not mine has been a big help to me.)

When it is your child who is suffering from something you want to do all that you can to make them better. Though my first instinct was to protect myself (“Hello! Anxiety and panic!” as I get worried about allergic reactions for me) but then “Mommy Mode” kicked in and I allowed myself to keep absorbing my daughter’s ailments. (I did ask my angels and guides to help me to not have a medical emergency myself.)

Motherhood and my abilities seems to collide from time to time. I try to do my best and droll with things to the best of my abilities and to thank the Universe along the way.

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The stories and topics that I share are as I have observed them, as I have lived them, and as they have happened to me, along my journey. They are not intended to hurt anybody and they are told as I have experienced them. I have also done my best to protect the identity of the subjects in my writings. If you find yourself reading something and suddenly question: “Is that about me?” If that is the case it probably is to some degree because there’s absolutely some kind of lesson in there for you.
If the topics or stories on my blog or in my other writings are not relatable to you, then it is not for you, at least not at this time. We are all in different places along our journeys. What resonates with some, won’t even touch on the surface for others.

Are you Trying to Create a New You Around the Same Old People?

I came across this quote, “Stop trying to create a new you around the same old people” and it really resonated with me.

It resonated with me on a personal level.

I currently have multiple social media accounts. Some that I have had for nearly 9 or so years, and others that I created in the last year and a half or so. I feel that the newer accounts are “more me” in the present time, and are connected with people who are more similar to me. People who I relate to. And really, people who have given me a sense of community, even if it has only been in the “social media sphere.”

Just today I was looking back at my original Facebook account. (Not the one associated with this blog.) I have somewhere between 500 and 600 contacts connected on that account – and that number includes the deleting of some contacts as I detoxed my contact list(s) at the start of the New Year. I combed through the contacts and I realized that I probably only relate to about 3% of the contacts that I am connected with on my older account. That three percent is the only group of people who I feel comfortable with being myself around and speaking freely about where I am in life right now. (May I remind you that in the last few years I discovered that I have some metaphysical gifts. That I am an Empath. And that I have come to the realization that I am here to help people heal on some level.) All of these things are the “new me” as opposed to the “old me” who those 500-and-some contact know. Or used to know. Or thought that they knew. I also don’t think that many of these contacts can or want to relate to where I am in this journey we call life.

new youThis realization translates into everyday life for me as well. I have left some groups within my community that I have felt no longer serve me. I know that can sound a little persnickety, but when you no longer enjoy something, or the people associated with it, I have learned that it is time to let it go.

My social circle has also shrunk as I have learned that I don’t fit in with people who I used to. Many times I don’t relate to the conversations taking place. (Small talk isn’t easy for Empaths.) It has been a struggle, but I have learned to put some space between me and people who I don’t relate to. Free time is a rare jewel and I have learned to not waste it with people who I don’t enjoy anymore and who knows. Chances are that they don’t or won’t enjoy the “new me” either.

old newSo I guess that the lesson here is to stop looking for the new me in the old places. And one of those “old places” would be a stale social media account that I have on Facebook. Realistically, I do feel people are always evolving and changing. The person that you are today should be different from the person who you were ten years ago, and the same goes for me. (How boring would it be to stay the same?) By letting go of the old us, we can embrace the new, or present-day us, but we can’t necessarily do that by hanging on to certain people. Sometimes we need new ones in our lives to match where we are today, and to go with the flow of the new us.

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The stories and topics that I share are as I have observed them, as I have lived them, and as they have happened to me, along my journey. They are not intended to hurt anybody and they are told as I have experienced them. I have also done my best to protect the identity of the subjects in my writings. If you find yourself reading something and suddenly question: “Is that about me?” If that is the case it probably is to some degree because there’s absolutely some kind of lesson in there for you.
If the topics or stories on my blog or in my other writings are not relatable to you, then it is not for you, at least not at this time. We are all in different places along our journeys. What resonates with some, won’t even touch on the surface for others.

Strengthen your Emotional Power with this quick, little Exercise!

We all have people in our lives who get under our skin or irritate our spirit from time to time. Maybe for you it is a co-worker, a relative, an Ex, or a busy-body neighbor who is always in your business.
I have a quick, little exercise that you can do anywhere: I want you to send *love* to three people who are bothering you. At first, this may not be easy, but you will feel freer every time you do it. When you practice sending love to your enemies, you are practicing compassion. You are also raising your vibration.
WSend Love_Revised 5.20.19 orig Jan 2019hen you do this exercise,  you are strengthening your emotional power.
Easy?
No.
Freeing?
Yes!
It doesn’t mean that you suddenly become friends with your enemy, but when you harbor anger or hate, you may notice things like repeated problems in your life, illness, debt, insomnia and even injury, just to name a few. Why hang on to that? Let it go!
Give this little exercise a try and feel free to drop me a line and tell me how it worked for you.
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Drained, Tired, Mentally and Emotionally Exhausted – Seasonal Depression or Hibernation Season?

hibernationIt is January and the holidays are behind us. This time of year, I find myself to be particularly drained, tired, and both mentally and physically exhausted. More and more people I talk to, tell me that they also feel the same. I don’t know how long this has been going on, but over the past few years I have noticed the cycle that my body follows right after the holiday season.

This time of year, I notice that I am more than “sleepy” through my day, but more like fatigued – chronic fatigued.  I find that I crave different foods and at times no food at all.  I have little to no interest being social this time of year. I also feel moody and seem to be in fog more often than not – the other day I left the store forgetting some of my groceries in the cart. Some may say that these symptoms mirror Seasonal Depression or Seasonal Affective Disorder.

Part of all of these symptoms I blame on the down side of the holidays. And by holidays, I mean Halloween through New Year’s. I personally feel like October through January 1st is a rat-race, no matter how I try to plan, be organized or pull back on obligations. There is the shopping, the preparations, the decorating, and if you have children like I do, there are the classroom parties, holiday programs, recitals, etc. Never mind the financial or emotional stress that the holidays can put on some people.

This time of year is the opposite of all of that. For every up, there is a down.

I know many people who take traditional antidepressants, or use light therapy to get them through this time of year. And many who I know who use these methods claim that they work well for them. However I have ALSO learned over the years from some of my homeopathic doctors and mentors that just like plants and animals, our bodies go through a natural hibernation cycle. Hibernation doesn’t necessarily mean “sleep” though our bodies need rest, but hibernation is a time when energy needs to be conserved because the body’s functions (and even cells) tend to be slowed down.

0537997451252ba92be6f02732fbc85fThis is the time of year that we ARE supposed to rest and go dormant so that we can reboot in the spring. (It is sort of ironic that people use this time of year to make resolutions and end up working themselves to death at their local gym, boot camps and exercise classes, isn’t it?) During this time of year I do pay extra attention to making sure that I am taking whatever vitamins or supplements that have been prescribed for me through my homeopathic doctor. I do find that I pay better attention to what I am eating, part of that may be the fact that I have more time to plan meals with a slower schedule. I also utilize my acupuncturist to help me through this challenging season.  I have given in to the fact that I should be catching up on all of the things I put off during the holiday season and I have given in to the idea that this is a great time of year to curl up and spend time with the books that I have been meaning to read, catching up on my Netflix and just plain resting and getting a nap in when I can,  or jump into bed early when my schedule allows. It isn’t seasonal depression – it is hibernation season!! My body needs to rest and renew!

 

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The stories and topics that I share are as I have observed them, as I have lived them, and as they have happened to me, along my journey. They are not intended to hurt anybody and they are told as I have experienced them. I have also done my best to protect the identity of the subjects in my writings. If you find yourself reading something and suddenly question: “Is that about me?” If that is the case it probably is to some degree because there’s absolutely some kind of lesson in there for you.
If the topics or stories on my blog or in my other writings are not relatable to you, then it is not for you, at least not at this time. We are all in different places along our journeys. What resonates with some, won’t even touch on the surface for others.

Detoxing in the New Year just Doesn’t Have to do with Food

detox

Resolutions. Lifestyle Changes. Detoxes – All of the Buzz Words that we hear every year about this time.

When it comes to our bodies and food, the word “detox” means to rid the body of toxic or unhealthy substances. But why limit your detox to just the substances in your body? Besides detoxing physically, should you be detoxing emotionally and spiritually as well? Where else are “toxic” or “unhealthy” things (or even energies) getting into your life?? The answer could be right under your nose…

Is there anything or anyone that is showing up in your social media news feed that needs to be detoxed? Negative energy can come to you in the form of social media though other people’s posts, rants and comments. Maybe it is time to scrub your news feed? And you, as a human in the physical world, also made up of energy, you are absorbing that negativity or toxicity that your eyes are skimming on a daily basis. Did you know that negative energy can also stay stagnant in your energy field? If the posts, comments or people who you follow on social media feel heavy or negative to you, drain you, or if they no longer are serving your highest good, be rid of them.

What are you watching on TV, at the Movie Theater or on Netflix? What are you listening to in the car during your commute? Is the energy, tone or content negative or positive? What is the energy of the people speaking or of the topics being discussed? What is the content of the show, mini series or documentary that you have been binge watching lately? Are you letting negative energy into your living room or your vehicle? Is what you are watching or listening to serving your highest good? You have the power to make changes.

pay attentionThis is also a great time to evaluate who you interact with, associate with and represent on a regular basis. Who are you hanging out with these days? Who is in your inner circle? Do these people raise you up or do they drain you? Are they your best support system or are they full of drama? Do they have your best interest at heart? What organizations do you belong to or are you associating yourself with?  Again, are they serving your highest good? If not, let them go. It is okay to walk away.

Do you have contacts in your phone or in your email address book who you no longer stay in contact with and most likely have not need to contact again? Let them go. Delete. It doesn’t have to mean that these contacts wronged you, but by hanging on to old, stagnant relationships, we can’t make room for new ones.

2a27732e993dab612d2f3fd83f3e5354.jpgYour diet is not only what you eat, but it is also what you read, watch and listen to. It is also the people you hang out with.  And in retrospect, we need to detox more than food from our bodies.

Don’t be afraid of letting people and relationships go. If people are meant to be in your life, they will find their way back. In the meantime, Detox. Let Go! Make Room for new!

Mysterious Health Symptoms. Are they Mine?

Time and time again throughout my so-called “Awakening Journey” I have struggled with knowing what health symptoms (and even emotions) are my own, or someone else’s.

As I have discussed in previous posts, I am an Emapth. An Empath has the ability to feel the thoughts, emotions, and energy of others. This can include physical symptoms as well.

The other day, I was on my way to visit a mentor of mine and out of nowhere, as I was driving, my left knee started to hurt. I felt a sharp pain and it was very noticeable. Though knee problems tend to run in my family, my knees have not been bothering me as of recently. With that said, every time I have or feel an ailment that comes on out of nowhere, my mind starts to spiral out of control….

“Is it a blood clot…”

“Wait… am I dehydrated? Maybe it is my lower leg that is hurting and not my knee…?”

“What if I can’t walk on my leg when I get where I am going…?”

“What if both of my knees start to hurt and it gets so bad that I have to pull over because I can’t drive…?”

You may be chuckling to yourself as you read the above thoughts that were racing through my head, but this is a glimpse into my world. I’ve had so many random ailments over the past few years that I go from 0 to 100 and then anxiety will come running in.

I tried to reason with myself that I would be seeing Erin soon and that she’d either help me with the pain or have a reason as to why I was in pain. (Erin specializes in Reiki, Energy Work and CranioSacral work and has been a wonderful mentor to me though out my awakening process.)

When I get to Erin’s office, she asks me what I’d like to do today, or what aliments I needed to fix. I explained to her that I have been feeling fine as of late, with the exception of my knee that started to hurt really bad on the way over. I did joke that maybe the pain isn’t mine, but I was sort of dismissing my comment.

Erin paused for a moment and said, “Nope. It isn’t your knee, it is someone else’s.” I was relieved to hear this, but I told her that I struggle with what is mine and what isn’t and how it puts me into panic mode sometimes.

Erin gave me a great tip that I have used ever since my visit with her. When I get an ailment, a pain, an emotion or a strange feeling that comes over me out of nowhere, she suggested that I ask if “Is this mine?” And if it isn’t mine that I should ask that it be put back in its proper space and time. Erin explained that if it was someone else’s ailment that I picked up, the ailment would go away. If it really is mine, well, then it would stay with me. So in the instance if the knee, I would say something like: “Is this pain in my knee mine? If it is not, please put it back in its proper space and time. Thank you.”

sickEver since learning this little tip, it has helped me tremendously. I do find that sometimes I need to ask more than once if the “ailment” is mine or not. By nature, I am a bit impatient and when things don’t go away in a split second I do find myself asking again. More times than not, I am freed of whatever is bothering me. There have also been times, when what I was feeling was really mine. For instance a few days after seeing Erin I didn’t feel very well. I asked that if my body aches where mine or not and went through the ritual of asking everything to be put back if it wasn’t mine. Well low and behold I did have a touch of the flu and no matter how many times I asked that the symptoms leave if they are not mine, they stayed until I was well again.

So the next time you aren’t sure if what you are feeling is really you or not, try asking if it is yours or not. And then ask that it be put back in it proper place and time. Be sure to say “Thank you” at the end of your ask. 😉

How I Pay Homage to my Passed Loved Ones During the Christmas Season

Angel Tree 2017_bAbout four years ago, I started a new holiday tradition in our family that allows us to remember loved ones who have passed, and allows my children to learn about relatives who they may have never met. Every Christmas I put up what I call our “Angel Tree.”

I am not sure WHERE I got the idea for this, but the thought just popped into my head: I wanted an angel tree! My thought behind it was that I would hang photos of passed loved ones on the tree and then as guests (grandparents, aunts, uncles, close friends, etc.)  arrive to our home on Christmas Day (we usually host) my children would present them with an ornament that has the guest’s written name on it. Together they would then go over to the tree and hang it anywhere on the tree that they would like. This would give our guests an opportunity to reflect on those who have passed and give them a chance to share memories with my children, if they so choose.

I loved the idea of this, but I needed to whip up a tree and its trimmings with only a few weeks to go before Christmas that year. I was determined that I wanted the tree to be gold. I discovered at that time that gold trees were hard to come by and cost a pretty penny. I decided to peruse local garage sale sites and I came across an inexpensive artificial tree with white branches that someone was selling. I decided to purchase it and I intended to spray paint it gold!

I never like driving to places where I have never been before. The tree was located over a half hour away, which seemed like an eternity getting there. I remember asking for “help” from my guides on the way there. Asking for assistance to find where I needed to go. Assistance in being safe. Assistance in liking the tree once I got all of the way there, etc.

Well, long story short, the tree was what I was looking for and in good enough shape, so I purchased it from the seller. On the way home, I had to turn against heavy traffic which I don’t like to do, so I ended up making a right turn, and then a U-turn, to get in the direction I needed to be to head home. Before making the U-turn, I saw a state mileage sign for a major highway that if you took it all of the way, would take you right to my now deceased grandparents’ house. It made me smile. Then on the way home, I kept seeing doves along the power lines on my side of the road. It felt as if they were actually watching me drive past them. I relate doves to symbols from Spirit and I felt comforted and even more relaxed as if some of my past relatives were watching me, or guiding me home from getting the tree.

So now, how did I design my Angel Tree? Well, I first took the white tree to my back yard, laid a tarp down and spray painted the heck out of it with gold spray paint. It was a challenge to find a nice day to do this, as temperatures in the Midwest during this time of year are generally too cold for painting anything outdoors. It took many coats and to this day, it could probably use a few more, but it turned into gilded gold tree.

I then purchased some small 2×3 and 3×3 sized photo frames. I added photos to the frames of loved ones who have passed – some frames with copies of photos, other with photo copies and in cases when I didn’t have a photo, I just printed the person’s name in fancy font on nicer paper and slipped them into the frames. I then attached ribbon to frames so that they could be hung.

The first year that we put the tree out, I used some gold and ivory ornaments and pearl garland strands that I already had laying around. As the years have gone by, I’ve added more ribbons and crystals to really make the tree a statement tree. I have also collected and even made some ornaments that either have an angelic theme to them, or have a symbolic meaning to me like doves, dragonflies and angel wings. We use the same ornaments year-to-year that have our guests’ names on them. We keep them in a gold basket under the tree until they arrive. Every year when I put the tree up, I feel my “angels” with me. I usually have some odd occurrence happen as well, like a light bulb flickering or going out in the room from across the tree. A reminder that they always  with me.

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The stories and topics that I share are as I have observed them, as I have lived them, and as they have happened to me, along my journey. They are not intended to hurt anybody and they are told as I have experienced them. I have also done my best to protect the identity of the subjects in my writings. If you find yourself reading something and suddenly question: “Is that about me?” If that is the case it probably is to some degree because there’s absolutely some kind of lesson in there for you.
If the topics or stories on my blog or in my other writings are not relatable to you, then it is not for you, at least not at this time. We are all in different places along our journeys. What resonates with some, won’t even touch on the surface for others.

I Don’t Look Like Your Stereotypical Love-and-Light, Patchouli, Intuitive Medium, and I was Disregarded for it

I recently went to an event that took place about a half hour from where I live that promoted itself as a one-stop location for holistic, health, and wellness. Communication about the event advertised its vendors specializing in such things as: Body and Energy Work, Tarot Readers, Mediums, and Astrologers, Henna Artists, Musicians and Local Artisans, Crystal Vendors, as well as other vendors having Holistic and Natural Products for both family and pets.

Since my “Awakening” I have not attended any metaphysical-related events. My Acupuncturist was going to be exhibiting at the event so I decided that I would go and check it out and if nothing else, I would be supporting my Acupuncturist by stopping by and saying hello to her. I also figured that I could use my Acupuncturist as an excuse to my husband as to why I was going to go and check out this “Health Fair” as I referred to it to him. (Wink! Wink!)

I wasn’t sure what to expect, but I figured what’s the worst that could happen, I get back in my car and leave?? I did let my Acupuncturist know that I was thinking of going. Her response was, “I’m curious to know thoughts on it if you do go.” (Looking back, this was a clue. A clue for me.)

The day was a bit chilly as it was early November. I dressed as I normally would. As if I was meeting a friend out to lunch. I had on a black, long-sleeved cotton shirt and on top of that I put a red, tartan plaid wrap on. I wore a pair of jeans and tall, (flat) black boots and I finished my look with black satchel handbag that I use (and beat up) almost every day. I did my hair normally and slapped on the usual makeup.  If anything I looked a little “Fall-ish” in my outfit, but I didn’t think anything of it as it is something that I would wear on many occasions when leaving the house. (See the image below for the wrap that I wore. I originally bought it from a boutique in my hometown, but it is still available online from different stores.)

plaid wrap

I got to the venue and made my way to the entrance. A man and woman arrived around the same time and both were friendly and we made small talk. I was sort of excited to see what was on the other side of the door as I had never been to this event before. Once I walked into the main area of the venue, I heard someone playing a guitar and saw a bunch of tables organized around the room with vendors at each of them. There was a variety of items on display. I made my way to a jewelry vendor. I started to look at a few things on her table. I noticed that she didn’t really make eye contact with me after her last customer walked away. I said “Hello” and she looked up and said “Hi” and then looked away.

I made my way to a few more tables. I stopped by a few crystal vendors – one acknowledged me, the other just looked at me and carried on with whatever she was doing. I then stopped at a holistic pet booth. I purchased a product there, but the vendor didn’t seem very grateful for the sale or conversation,but perked up when the next person behind me started looking at her products.

I eventually made my way to the part of the room where the psychics were giving readings and where energy workers were trying to sell their “healing packages.”  I sort of just kept wandering around the room and observed. I tried to see if I got the urge to sit for any of the readers. I did feel the pull to go to an energy worker, but once she started talking, I realized that she was trying to sell me on a package deal for a lot of money, which was in essence the same thing that my Reiki gal already does for me for the fraction of the price.

I did see my acupuncturist and stopped by her booth to say hello. She greeted me with a big hug and said that she was happy to see me. I didn’t want to take up too much of her time as she had a bunch of attendees in her space trying an acupuncture treatment and I wanted to be respectful.

I walked around some more sizing up the psychics in the room. I’ll be honest, I didn’t care for the energy that most gave off. (I suppose that I can say the same thing about many of the vendors who were there as well.) I did come across a local intuitive life coach who I have heard of and follow on social media. I decided to sit for a reading with him. The reading went well and had some good information in it, so not all was lost that afternoon. After the reading I stopped by my Acupuncturist’s booth again and told her that I was going to head out. We said that we’d see each other at my next appointment.

On my way home I processed what I saw, “felt” and observed at the event. I was a bit surprised that my hair wasn’t blown back. (I like to use that phrase. I got it from a good friend of mine.) I was a bit disappointed that I didn’t meet someone there who may help me on my “journey” shall we say. I was but yet I really wasn’t surprised that though I was in a setting with self-proclaimed “spiritual,” and “love and light” sort of people, it wasn’t further from the truth. I have always known but proved to myself after being at this event that I don’t fit the ideal look or mold of a light worker, intuitive medium, whatever you want to call me.  However, I don’t fit in in most places that I go, so why should this be any different?

The best spiritual teachers, vendors, shop owners, energy workers and psychics whom I have met are accepting of all, no matter what they look like or where they come from. They have no judgement. Clearly the people at this event are not part my “tribe” as they say.